I've talked about it time and time and time and time again (probably more times than that, but those are my main rants). But I realized a few days ago that we're nearing our end, so I'd better get my thoughts out (just in case anyone else is dealing with the ups and downs of breastfeeding and happen to be following my little journey).
When I say "nearing our end" on breastfeeding, that's actually an unknown...as with most things in life. He's just over 16 months old and still nurses (albeit for a shorter amount of time) early in the morning and just before bed. I pump once at work now -- sometimes I add it to his cow's milk to drink at the sitter's, and other times I test to see if he'll just eat the cow's milk. Unfortunately, he's become a sporadic milk drinker, so he doesn't always drink it very well. Other times, he downs it like a champ.
But, when I do pump, I'm to the point of getting -- get this -- only about an ounce to 1 1/2 ounces. ONCE a day.
Wow.
I'm reminded of a year ago when I used to get over 28 ounces a day, plus feeding throughout the night. Consider this cow one hay bale short of being put out to pasture.
Then there are those random times in the middle of a Saturday where he comes to me and gestures to his chest -- his little "sign" that he's hungry -- and we nurse for a minute or two. I don't know if he's REALLY hungry, or if he just wants some snuggle time (since he really doesn't snuggle unless you get silly and tickle him; he loves to laugh), but I'll take it. I'm sure I don't "give" him as much as he may want since demand begets supply, but he doesn't fuss, so it's all good.
I'm sure I'll do one final update when he finally kicks the habit, but for now, this is how life seems to be going. And, on a terribly personal side note, I think this up and down of breastfeeding is throwing my hormones (hence my "cycle") totally out of whack. So not cool. :-P
And now you can go about your day knowing a tad too much about me. You're welcome.
Ah, the pull and tug of heart strings ... so excited for the little ones to be growing up and become slowly more independent and the tears that its happening all at once... (or maybe it was just me with the tears, both times). I remember no longer pumping while at work, the feedings only before work, at bedtime and during boo-boos/tantrum times... I was glad to finally have my body back, but contradicted that with wanting so badly for them to still want/need to breastfeed. Hang in there Momma :) New chapters always bring about new adventures. Thoughts ...
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