Something Feels Off

So, I've been feeling incredibly melancholy lately. It could be the magnetic poles and their realignment. Perhaps it's the new spring weather. More likely than not, it's the fact that I lost my first student to death recently. Yes, definitely, that's it.

Alicia's death has affected countless people, for attending a school district with slightly over 200 students, total. I'm no longer a faculty member of that school, although I will forever be a part of the family I shared while working there. It's a close-knit group, to put it mildly. So, with this death happening so suddenly, so tragically fast, without even Alicia herself knowing it was coming, many of us have been shaken to the core.

While I want to escape the melancholy, the everyday monotony and stress fractures of life has only compounded it and made it near impossible the escape. The only thing that really makes me feel better is the thought of pushing headlong into some home projects during vacation.

I know that I'll never forget Alicia and her wry sense of humor; the energy that she brought to the classes I taught her and her other unforgettable classmates in the library; the silly drama that she divulged to me so willingly during afternoon study halls on a daily basis. I was told today by a sage, 30+ year educator that I'll never forget losing her - so, instead, I will remember those memories, and attempt to remember the good memories that I'm being gifted everyday by students in a completely different, but somehow comfortably similar school. I'm off to a funeral.